📧 from Cathleen Falsani

Logan,

Anger, much like fear, can blur our vision and perspectives. I am choosing to read your last note to me through that lens. I believe sincerely, however, that your anger with me is misplaced.

A few things:First, I use my GMail account almost exclusively for all of my electronic communication. My Sojourners email account is forwarded to my Gmail address and for efficiency and consistency's sake, that's where I handle all of my correspondence. How you interpreted that as some sort of a slight is a bit of a stretch, in my opinion.

I receive and reply to hundreds of emails each day as the GP editor. The day you sent your initial submission I was with most of our senior staff at a board meeting in Baltimore, as I believe I told you. I discussed your submission with senior staff responsible for making decisions about what we post about our CEO Jim Wallis as soon as I could between sessions. Your communication pushing for a decision – or you'd take the piece elsewhere – was not greeted with a lot of warmth.

Professionally speaking, it felt like tacit manipulation at best, but we still considered the post in good faith. But, given that our all-day meeting went until late in the evening, we were not able to meet your deadline and I believe I told you to please feel free to take it elsewhere if that was best for you.

When you sent your revised version the next week, the decision already had been made not to run with it because of its criticism of Mr. Wallis, which (see below) was not felt to be just given his track record and personal, quite public commitment to veterans' welfare. If my response a few minutes later felt dismissive, you have my apologies. It was sent, if memory serves, quickly between meetings and editing other submissions on deadline, and was not meant to be curt or unkind.

Secondly, it was not my decision not to run your blog post criticizing Mr. Wallis for not mentioning the suicide rates and other sufferings of our veterans returning home from Iraq and Afghanistan during his public appearance and discussion with Richard Land at the National Press Club last month. That decision was made internally and, as I thought I explained but perhaps not well enough, was based on what were viewed as unfair criticisms of Mr. Wallis who, as I mentioned in a previous email, has spoken at length in the past (and will continue to do so in the future) about our responsibility as people of faith to care for, advocate for and support in all ways our veterans and men and women in the armed services. I communicated that decision to you and you are angry with me for doing so.

I get that. But please don't vilify the messenger.

The decision was neither arbitrary nor personal.

The following, however, is personal:  I am deeply and passionately invested in the welfare of both our veterans and our service men and women. My brother is an Air Force A-10 pilot and veteran of two combat tours in Afghanistan. Three of my nephews are currently serving in the Navy on submarines, my stepson is an Army surgeon at the military hospital in San Antonio and three years ago I lost one of my dearest friends in the world when the Humvee he was riding in outside Sadr City struck an IED. He was a decorated Navy SEAL and one of the finest people I've ever known. My family moved from Chicago to California to live closer to his widow, daughter and best friend (who is my own son's godfather). The issues that you've written about and wrote about in the piece you submitted to us for the blog are deeply, passionately personal to me as a person of faith and as a member of a family that has been touched by many of the things you've written about. I am on your side.

The only reason your blog post did not run was because of its focus on criticizing Mr. Wallis for not speaking more explicitly about veterans during his event with Land. As you may have seen, I ran Shane's piece last week where he quoted you at length. I was very happy to do so and I know your story affected many of our readers. (http://sojo.net/blogs/2011/11/11/when-soldiers-become-saints)

Your decision not to collaborate, as you put it, with us in the future is unfortunate, but it is yours and if that's what you feel you need to do I will not argue with you about it.

However, if you change your mind, I'd be happy to read anything you wanted to share with our readers. You remain most welcome at Sojourners.

Grace and peace to you,

Cathleen